The Patina of Life
Beautiful oxidation.
I have a bunion on my left foot. At a podiatrist consultation the doctor x-rayed it, revealing arthritis in the big toe, which he said he would “scrape out” while in there sawing off my bunion. Two friends who had successful bunion surgery were consulted and interrogated over lunch. But then I read somewhere that they can and do grow back in 20% of cases. In the end, surgery was cancelled, I gave the bunion a beautiful name and purchased wider footbed shoes.
During a summer stint working as a vegetable farmer over the last summer, I mangled my right index finger while trying to expedite the slowing down of a spinning drum that was drying kale. Wrinkles have taken up permanent residence on my face, grey hair is overtaking my natural auburn color, and my left knee does not have much desire left in it to walk down hills for any length of time. Such is life in an aging body.
I remember the year I turned 40. Suddenly, the font on the pages of my favorite magazine were no longer clearly visible. Squinting ensued. It literally happened overnight. I had always prided myself that since childhood, my vision had been 20/20. Not anymore. (I’m still rocking the 1.25+ readers from Wholefoods - picking out a kicky new pair every year).
The shining light on all of this is my vehement knowledge that if I could - I would not go back to being any of my younger ages.
I turn 57 next month, and the only thing about that number that I do not like is that it is odd and not even, making it less attractive (to me) than 58 or 60. My 56-year-old body, face, voice, and gait are the resulting patinas of my life.
The songs you have sung; the Yoga, golf, or bonspiel curling you have practiced and played; the babies you have birthed, carried, fed, and loved; the walks you have enjoyed and endured; the marathons you have run and the mountains you have skied - all contribute to the beautiful outer version of you at every age and stage. Even the finger, the knee, the hair, the eyes, and the bunion.
Spotify Playlist: You are Enough
Blessings & Comfort,
Photo Credits: Melanie McLeod | top - Omaha, Nebraska | second down - Memorial Park, Omaha, Nebraska | second from bottom - Stornoway, Isle of Lewis (Donnie Morrison) | bottom - Bhadra Yoga studio, Omaha, Nebraska